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Poetry
and Dreams
First
Love
Unrequited
Love
Loss
Potential
Moon
Dreams
Blue
Dawn
The ones that got away~
I don't know how many times I loved someone who didn't love me. All of them? Certainly enough that I've lost count. And how many of those times did I also love in silence? Gosh, too many even there. At this point in my life I would really love to find them all - to share with them how I felt all those years ago. I don't know that it would matter to them now, but I'd like to do it anyway. Perhaps some strange twist of fate will land them right here.
I Want
I want the summer sky at night
To remind me of you
I'd like to see a desert sunset after a rainstorm
With your arms around me
I want to witness the first snowfall
After a night with you
I want the first breezes of fall approaching
To tell me you'll be near
All I know of love and trust and friendship
Come from friends long past
And all the beauty I saw in the world and me
I see now in your eyes
So all the gentleness and loveliness around me
I want to share with you
I want the budding trees of springtime
To show me life begins anew
I want the love and trust I built over a lifetime
To find a home in you.
There Are No Dreams
There are no dreams
I've ever dreamed
That live up to
One night with you
In my dreams
I say the right words
To make you love me
But it can not compare
With the feeling
You inspire with a touch
I can dream
The actions and the words
But not the love below
No dream I've ever known
No hope I've ever had
Compares to you
Because with you
I don't have to dream.
With Your Arms Around Me
With your arms around me
I can tell you every wish
I've ever had
Because I feel
They will not harm me
Though they have before
With your arms around me
I don't have to ask
If there is a tomorrow
Because I'm happy
Just to have today
I don't always know
What to say
Or what to do next
I don't always believe
That I'm ok
Or strong enough to win
But if you hold me
I know I've already won
And if you hold me
It doesn't matter
What I do next
With your arms around me
I can face the world
Because I'm not alone.
I Fall Too Fast and Too Far
It scares me to give of myself
Because I never believed
I had much to give
But I'm learning a new world order
Where my dreams
Not only have value
But also might come true
But it all scares me
Because I'm afraid that
I fall too fast and too far
I try really hard
To trust in your heart
And that you won't run away
But each step I take ahead
Show me just how much
I have to lose
It scares me to open up
Because I can not protect
What I store inside
But each step I take
Shows you're still here
And there is more to give
It scares me to trust you
Because I want your love
And I'm never sure
Which step is too far
But you've shown me
That no step I take
Can be too far
But it all scares me
Because I'm afraid that
I fall too fast and too far
And that you won't be there
To catch me when I do.
Cry For You
I want so much
To cry for you
To say my heart
Has been broken again
But no tears have come
And my heart feels whole
I feel a sadness deep inside
But I cannot help but smile
Life has let me down
Because another dream faltered
I wanted us to work
I wanted you to be the one
But you want freedom
And are afraid to commit
I want to say to you
Please take a chance
I want at least one dream
To have a fair shot
But like the tears
It's way back deep inside
Underneath the voice
That tells you how happy
I am you're not leaving me
Only backing up a bit
But maybe if I cried
Or if I told you
What's deep inside
You'd try with me
And let me dream again.
I Hear In Words Around Me
I hear in words around me
The sadness in my heart
The years of loving in vain
Of wanting more than I could have
I cry for the pain
In someone else's heart
Because I think it's weak
To cry over my own life
I have an image in my mind
Of the love I want from you
But the harder I try to see it
The more it retreats from my view
It says that some day
I will find the one
But if I say is he the one
It says "I'm just not sure"
I want so much from life
I couldn't begin to say
But I still wonder
Is it too much to want you
I hear in words around me
All I do not have
And all I want from life
Has boiled down to you
The things I lost
The love I never had
The dreams my image gives
Only to pull them away
They all diminish
When I look in your eyes
Because all I want
Is some love from you
But like my dreams
It drifts away
And I know it never was
And I hear in words around me
Pointless years and pointless tears
And too much love for you.
My World Ended
My world ended
The day you walked out my door
Not so much
Because I couldn't have you
As you couldn't even
Be my friend
I know you said
We'd still be friends
But you walked away
And haven't looked back since
I know you said
You care a lot
But you turned your back
And didn't see the tears
My world ended
Not so much
Because you'd never kiss me
As you'd never hold me
When I got scared
I remember
You used to squeeze me senseless
Because I'd been gone so long
Now you can't even say you missed me
I remember
We used to talk for hours
Now you don't have time for hello
My world ended
Not so much
Because you didn't love me
As you couldn't bear to know
That I loved you
Hold My Hand
The dreams I dreamed
Just yesterday
Seem lost and faded.
As days go by
The assurance I had
Regarding my heart
Dwindled down to zero
As we talked
I used to follow my heart
Without question
But now no sound
Is there for me
God reached out his hand
Into my life
And said into my ear
It's time for you to live
It had all been easy
Answers to the world
But now only darkness
And you to hold my hand
To Be Wrong
Through all the pain
And all the tears
And the love I lost
Throughout the years
I knew a day
Would someday come
When it would not hurt
To be wrong
I did not think
When I met you
That pain had gone
And I was stronger too
I hoped that maybe
I had found someone
After all these years
I had finally won
But then I lost
Like I knew I would
But I held on
As best as I could
I counted on time
And tried to hide
From hopes I felt
But kept inside
The dreams I thought
Would someday be
If I held tight
Until you saw me
I was wrong again
Now I finally see
Keeping things inside
Only hurts me
In the past I said
And you'd think I'd know
Sometimes it's best
If you just let go
If I did let go
I could go on
But I still want you
To be the one
I believe in my heart
That I've lost you
But it doesn't hurt
If that's true
I'm hanging around
Though I set you free
Hoping suddenly someday
You will see me
So with all this
And all my dreams
No matter what happens
It definitely seems
That after all this time
I must be strong
It did not hurt
To be wrong
I'm growing stronger
And stronger still
From here on out
It's all downhill
The hardest part
Of the battle's done
And I'm sure in time
I will have won.
Ice Inside
I sometimes think
There's only ice inside
Because no matter
How much I love you
Or how much I give
I still don't cry
When I believe
I'm losing you
I know for certain
I can live without you
But part insists
I want you forever
I think it's ice
Weighing down my heart
Because I let you
Do what you will
And it doesn't hurt
Everyone tells me
That it's not ice
That all it means
Is I don't love you
But if I ever loved
I'm pretty sure
That I do love you
And if I never loved
Then how can I say
There is no ice
Blocking the way
I keep hoping
Someone will come along
To melt the ice away
But as it seems
It won't be you
You'd rather have
And ice-logged love
Than one that asks
You to love too
Meant For Me
I want too much
And I dream too much
And my mind told me
It was time to cry
But my heart was filled
With love and laughter
Happy that of all things
I was simply alive
I smiled at gloomy skies
And laughed at
The dreams that died
There's so much time
And so much life
And so much left to do
My heart rejoiced
That everything was
And that I was allowed
To see it so
I pictured stars
And sun and waves
And rain and snow
There's so much life
And so much love
And so much left to do
My heart told me
To just let it be
Everything is meant
To work out for me
If I don't get
The love I want
Another will come along
And someday soon
Dreams will come true
And even my mind
Will agree
There's so much time
And so much life
And so much love
And it's all meant for me
A Thousand Dreams
I dreamed a thousand dreams today
Each one more sparkling than the last
I started off the day ok
I'm ending up quite well indeed
I thought dreams brought me down
By making me think of what
I could never have
But I found out today
That dreams lift me up
By letting me see the possibilities
In each moment in time
I dreamed of knights in armour
And castles grand
I dreamed of waves and oceans
And a house on the sand
I dreamed of mountains
And valleys and soft winter nights
Through it all I found
A hope building within me
Each dream raising me higher
Than I thought I'd ever be
I dreamed of star-filled nights
And a fireplace and snow
I dreamed of summer sun
And a picnic by the sea
I dreamed of faraway places
And a cottage in the rain
What made my day most of all
Was how dreams can live
Till the end of time
And how when I'm down
They'll come floating by
And how through it all
There's still a chance
However small
That they can be filled by you.
I Want the World
I always wanted the world
And everything it holds
But I never realized before
I had desires so grand a bold
I want the sun and stars
And the moon up above
I want fame and fortune
But most of all just love
All the longing I ever had
For the things I didn't know
Brought me down and down
I didn't think I'd sink so low
I couldn't see myself as well
As I always thought I could
I couldn't stop and take a look
Even though I knew I should
I always thought if I tried enough
I'd get everything I'd ever need
I didn't know the little extras
Could easily make me bleed
When I started to believe
My dreams were too big for me
I thought it must be true
All I had was all that was meant to be
Wanting all I do and more
I forget what I have inside
I don't see what I have so far
Or how hard I have tried
But now I see myself
And everything I've tried to be
If I bring my dreams down a step
Everything will come to me
Dreams don't have to die
And hearts don't have to bleed
If you're happy in life
You have all you'll ever need
But I still want the world
The sun and stars are there for me
And fame and fortune
Will someday be
But through it all
Even though dreams come true
I didn't know it was too much
To just want you.
As Dreams Go
As dreams go
Mine were not so grand
No fame
No fortune
Just love
Just one
Just simple
But as dreams go
Mine would
Break my heart
Each glance
Each touch
Brought hope
Brought disappointment
Brought pain
Then I met you
And I was
Scared
But you were
Gentle
And caring
And loving
So I cared
And as dreams go
Mine were broken
You walked away
And I cried
No blame
I had no right
I loved
As I do
No expectations said
But many felt
So as dreams go
Mine were demanding
And I gave in
And I set myself up
And lost
But so did you
Anything
I've said I could tell you anything
And I believe that's true
But some secrets need to be kept
Even, my dear, from you
Wishes and dreams and casual thoughts
That could tear my heart in two
If I spoke them out loud
And forever lost what I have in you
Not that you'd walk away
Or love me any less
But things would never be the same
If I ever tried to express
The secrets deep inside my heart
I could tell you anything
And you'd always be my friend
But this secret is for me alone
Until the bitter end
Your friendship means too much to me
To throw it all away
On wishes and dreams and other things
That might never come true anyway
So I'll keep it locked up in my heart
Until forever and a day
And maybe up in heaven
Some day far away
I'll share with you that anything
I never could express to you
I wondered every now and then
What it would be like to be truly loved by you.
Lost to Me
I dream of things I can never have
Of hearts forever lost to me
I fall in love too easily
With men who can't love me
It never matters that I'll always lose
And that my heart will break in two
I fall in love with them anyway
Invite them in my heart to stay
So why would I ever tell you
How far I've fallen for you
The place I have inside your heart
Should be just the start
But I know it will never be
You could never fall for me
So I dream of what I'll never have
Your heart is also lost to me.
Share My Heart
I want to write you poems
Share my heart
And let you in
It shouldn't be so easy
To give it all to you
To lay out my soul
For you to read
Not knowing what you'll do
But you say it's beautiful
And I'm wonderful too
I've never had anyone
Say the things you do
I want to write you poems
Share my heart
And let you in
You write them back to me
And I treasure every one
A glimpse at your heart
The beauty inside
You make me strong
You lift me up with tender words
I want to embrace you
Hold you tight to me
A thank you words can't say
I want to write you poems
Share my heart
And let you in
Say you'll let me
Say it's fine
Say you want the same thing
It's so easy to write for you
There's so much still to say
You read my words
You see my soul
If you want me to stop
You'll have to let me know
I want to write you poems
Share my heart
And let you in
In Love With a Friend
You're my best friend
And I never want that to end
But sometimes it makes me sad
Because I've been here before
In love with a friend
Who can never love me
I've experienced the pain
Wanting something that will never be
But I can't walk away
I need you too much
Your friendship means more
Than the passion in my heart
I know better than to say
The dreams I have of you
You'd turn from me
I'd lose too much
And I don't think my heart
Could take the loss of you
You only see me as a friend
And I have to remind myself
That it's enough for me
It should be clear to me
Time has definitely proved it
Love is fickle, so often fleeting
And friendship still remains
If I told you that I loved you
It might not work out
But if I keep it to myself
I have you for forever
My best friend at my side
But sometimes late at night
I dream you love me
And it makes me sad
Why can't I have it all
Best friends and lovers
Couldn't it be sweet
I know it's just a dream
But I want it just the same
Secret Love
As I turned to leave your world behind
I thought I saw your smile
So pure a thing it could have been
A dream to keep me here awhile
I'd pass up love a thousand times
To be with you again
So pure a thing your love for me
I wish it didn't have to end
But secret loves are hard to keep
And time is hard to find
The patience and strength it takes to wait
Aren't fated to be mine
I'd give my life to have you know
That I do love you
But your eyes are closed, you didn't smile
You wouldn't know it's true
Secret love is hard to keep
It only lasts awhile
So I think I'll have to say good-bye
But I thought I saw you smile
Will You Shelter Me
Will you shelter me?
I'm not asking you to love me
I'm not asking for forever
Just a brief and blissful moment
Wrapped in your embrace
Just a moment to touch you
And find some comfort there
Will you shelter me?
I'm not asking for commitment
I'm not asking you to stay
Just hold me for a moment
And let these cares fade away
Just let me linger in your arms
Until the tears disappear
Will you shelter me?
Faded Memory
I wonder where you are
And if you think of me
The way I always think of you
Do you still reach for me
Or am I some faded memory
You finally outgrew
I wonder how you're doing
If you're happy with life
If your dreams have come true
Or do you have an empty spot
Somewhere deep inside
Like the one I have for you
I wonder why you're gone
And if you'll ever return
Were those feelings true
Or was it all a lie
And do you still love me
The way I'll always love you
I wonder if I'll always wonder
Or will I one day know
Dance
I wish that I had kissed you
All those years ago
As we danced
I wish we had shared more
Than a few dances
Been more
Than simply friends
I would have liked to kiss you
All those years ago
Pressed my body close to yours
And let temptation rule
But I just shyly danced
And let the moment pass
Leaving both of us
With so many might have beens
Reach For You
The urge to reach for you
Is overwhelming in the extreme
I almost cannot fight it
The simple thought
That you will turn away
And pull from my grasp
Yet again
Is all that stills my hand
Though my heart nearly bursts
With tears
With longing
With regret
To see you and believe
You do not want me
Even though I want you
Still
Plays havoc with my heart
And yet I have this urge
To reach for you
You Save Me
When darkness descends
And hope is lost
You are there
Lighting a way for me
Without knowing it
Without trying
You save me
And that love I feel
Is rewarded
By your existence
Unrequited
And unfulfilled
And yet a lighthouse
In stormy weather
Lifting me and preserving me
When all else fails
Without meaning to
You save me
