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Poetry
and Dreams
First
Love
Unrequited
Love
Loss
Potential
Moon
Dreams
Blue
Dawn
New beginnings~
The night descends and it would be easy to believe that there is only darkness ahead. But if you are patient, dawn will break. And so I had thought I'd reached an end and that there was nothing more to write. But my dawn arrived and I realized that it was just the end of the beginning and there were poems in me still.
Shimmering
Shimmering water ripples about his form
Touching him in ways I can only dream
Water clinging to his skin as he rises
Only to coalesce and slide over contours
Tracing paths I long to touch and taste
Droplets sparkle in the sunlight
Turning him into some golden-hued deity
Shimmering before my eyes, incandescent
My fingertips tingle with the desire to touch
To feel ripples spread through me
As I worship his form completely
Until I evaporate into the summer heat
With all the brilliance of the shimmering water
Touch You
I want to touch you
Feel my fingers against your skin
Memorize the texture
Smooth and rough combined
Find the pulse points
Feel the beat of your heart
Keeping time with mine
Absorb your heat
I want to feel you
That charge of energy
Closing the space between us
Your breath tickling soft
Bringing my skin to life
Your fingertips on my face
Your lips caressing mine
I want to possess you
Slide inside your mind
Make your heartbeat quicken
Set all your nerves on fire
Compel you to reach for me
An ache that only I can ease
Moonlight
The moonlight falls softly
With pale eerie glow
Setting my spirit free
Energizing my soul
I lift my arms up to the heavens
Letting it rain down on me
Feeling it slide over me
As if it had a weight
That only I could feel
The cool night air
Filling my lungs
Stars twinkling bright above
The silence is pervasive
It’s just the moon and me
In silent soft communion
For a moment or an hour
A breath of eternity
Subtle Sorrow
Sometimes the tears press close
And my chest aches with them
They clog my throat and blur my eyes
And I hardly know why they come
And sadness envelops me
Because the tears are mine alone
And no one longs to share them
There is no warm shoulder
No arms to hold me close
No kiss to make me forget
No voice to soothe the ache
Perhaps that’s why I long to cry
The loneliness and despair
Wondering if my lips will go unkissed
If my heart will go uncherished
But as the tightness begins to ease
And I can begin to breathe again
I wonder if I simply need to let it go
Appease that pressing emotion
And simply cry until it’s gone
Dry my tears and open my heart
Let hope slide back in place
And believe that better things will come
Perhaps just around the bend
All the things I lost over the years
Were just bringing me here
So that I could love again
Perhaps I need to embrace the tears
Before I can embrace the joy
Those things are hard to remember though
As I’m washed in subtle sorrow
Holding those tears so close inside
Not wanting to let them go
Past Life
I can’t help but think
We shared some previous life
Perhaps stood on some distant shore
Danced with dolphins
Until our purpose was spent
Carefree and careless
Taking it all for granted
Some remnant still lives inside me
And I look at you with longing
Wanting that transcendence
Wondering if you feel it too
Perhaps we stopped in a meadow
Made love in sweet clover
And laughed under a crystal sky
I wonder if the energy is harnessed
Waiting for a touch to set it free
And if my fingertips grazed your skin
Would you ignite with me?
I see something inside you
Like echoes of some lost song
And I think we must have loved before
In some far off forgotten land
Whispered promises under the stars
To find our way together again
Do you hear the things I do
Deep inside your dreams?
Blood and Moonlight
I bleed endlessly
Life force slowly ebbing out
It recedes at times
And I believe I'm healed
Only to find the wound reopened
Flowing as strong as before
Backwards and forwards
Like the ocean tide
Am I pulled by unseen forces
Responding to some forgotten moonlight
Endlessly entwined
But just when I think
There are no more drops to give
And my heart must surely cease
The moonlight fades
And I wonder if it's finally done
But I know there's more to give
And the tides will turn again
So I bleed out my soul
For the world to see
Wondering if the ocean
Ever begs the moon for peace
Wanting You
I see you
And I'm filled with emotions
That I can hardly contain
I want to wrap my arms around you
Pull you close and tight
Cherish you
Fill you with those feelings
That bubble out of me
Lose myself in the rapture
Of your body pressed to mine
But societal conventions
Contain my enthusiasm
Afraid you'd be uneasy
With my passionate heart
So I bite my lip
As emotions swell
Sure at any moment I'll burst
And scatter on the winds
Like so many pollen seeds
All from wanting you
Wishes
I look at you and I find myself wishing
When I swore that wishes were foolish
But it comes from deep inside of me
And I can’t stop it even though I’ve tried
I wish you’d want me with a yearning
That carries me into your deepest dreams
That you’d look forward to every moment
With anticipation you can scarce contain
I wish you’d find me enchanting
In a way that makes you ache for more
I can’t expect a deep, abiding devotion
You know so little about my soul
But I wish it was your hearts desire
To know the things that no one knows
I can’t put these feelings into words
And share them whenever we meet
Too afraid you’re much too practical
To entertain such foolish, romantic dreams
Too sure that you’re so down to earth
You’d only remind me it’s much too soon
To want someone with so much strength
When there’s so much you do not know
You’d smile at me and shake your head
And say – I wouldn’t go quite that far
I wonder if you ever lose yourself
And chase after irrational, impractical things
I wish I knew inside your mind and heart
To know if there’d ever be room for me
I wish I could be so deeply entrenched
You’d never be able to let me walk away
I wish I could enchant you like other men
And capture your heart for my very own
But I fear you’re much too reasonable
And your heart impossible to win
Especially for a silly, foolish girl like me
Who’s always lost inside her dreams
Don't Know How
I don’t know how to enchant you
It breaks my heart sometimes to try
Always just beyond my reach
Slipping like sand through my fingers
I wonder sometimes if I should just give up
Place you on that shelf of impossible things
But that only brings a deeper ache
Giving up on all those foolish dreams
I don’t know how to seduce you
Or if you even want me to try
Not sure which way I should even turn
Ripping my heart from my chest
And watching you walk away again
I don’t know how to get through
How to be more than a casual friend
You haunt my dreams some nights
And I fight the pain of never knowing
If I’ve ever been any part of yours
I consider for the thousandth time
That I should just let you go your way
Knowing that someone else
Will find a way inside your heart
And experience the desire and devotion
I hoped would one day be mine
It’s such a bitter pill to swallow
And I choke on it each time I try
Still clinging to the painful notion
You might find yourself in love with me
Unaffected
I sit in awe of your calm exterior
So unaffected by anything I say or do
Casual and aloof so far from me
And me so lost and fallen and open
Drowning in images of you
Your hands on my skin
Making me breathless and bothered
Your mouth tasting and tormenting
I feel it as if it was more than dreams
You step tantalizingly close
Whispering in my ear at times
But I wonder if you’re just a gentleman
Not wanting to break my little heart
You’ve made no sweet promises
Avoided my gentle inquiries
I often wonder if my tender kisses
Would meet with cool indifference
And if my heart could take the news
That I’m just another girl to you
Closer
I want you closer
Closer still
I want you beside me
Against me
In me, through me
I want you lost
In my every sensation
Falling, flying
Wrapped up in me
I want you closer
Closer still
Consuming me
Filling me
So deep
You think you’ll drown
No, that’s not quite
Close enough
Not quite
Close enough
Get closer
Waiting
I sit here waiting
With entirely too much time
To think
My mind travels paths
That serve no purpose
That cut to the quick
And make me bleed
Doubt settles in
Imagination runs wild
And I feel like such a fool
When the waiting ends
And I see I was wrong
I Want
I want to drive you crazy with desire
I want your every waking thought to be of me
I want you to feel you’ll never get enough
I want to haunt your every dream
And then when I have you so wrapped up in me
I want to ease all your aches and pains
I want to bring the sun back into your life
I want to kiss your cares away
I want to make you whole again
And when your world is right once more
You can tell me it doesn’t have to end
You can crawl inside my heart to stay
You can keep me safe and warm
You can kiss all these tears away
And then when I’m surrounded by you
You can show me things I’ve never seen
You can take me places I’ve never been
You can steal my heart away for your very own
You can make me believe in dreams
I Think Too Much
I think too much
Give weight to words
That should be as air
Take on the burden of what if
For things that may never be
Replay conversations in my head
And add undertone and nuance
Read too much between the lines
And twist my heart in knots
I think too much
And share too little
I second guess myself
And never pause to wonder why
Embracing doubt and despair
Sure there’s always a catch
That nothing good can last
I think too much
I often wish I could just be
Disengage my brain
And take everything at face value
But no matter how I try
I simply think too much .
The Jump
I stand on the edge
And I see the earth falling away
I feel it in my gut
That sense of falling
When I’m standing still
And panic creeps in
A blinding panic
That paralyzes limbs
Unable to move forward
Toward whatever awaits
Or retreat back to safety
Caught forever at this edge
Between what I know
And what might be
If I could only jump
And trust the wind to catch me
Doubt and Despair
I’m lost in the wilderness
Of doubt and despair
I don’t know which way to turn
To find my way home
And there’s something
So familiar here
Like a long forgotten dream
It clings to me
Pulling me deeper
Begging me to stay
I’m too tired to fight
And they’re too persuasive to ignore
I’m half tempted to give in
Forget there ever was
Another world for me
It would be so very easy
To just lay down here
And let them have me
But deep in my heart
I’m still hoping
To find my way home
Let Me
Let me be that warmth you seek
Wrap yourself in my embrace
And ease that bitter chill
Let me permeate your skin
With all the emotion I contain
And light a fire that won’t cease
Let me soothe the aches and pains
With softly spoken words of love
And prepare you for another day
Let me be the comfort you need
Lay your head against my breast
And drift away to the land of dreams
Center of Your World
In those stolen moments
I know I’m the center of your world
But stolen moments never last
And you slip from my grasp
And I don’t know anything anymore
I lurk around the edges of your world
And wonder where I fit in
Trying to catch your attention
Hoping your focus will turn to me
Another stolen moment
To fuel hope and desire
A moment by definition
And I wonder how many there’ll be
Or if one day I’ll find myself
So far off on the fringes
That your attention slides over me
Like I was never even there
All those stolen moments forgotten
Too far from the center of your world
